Even the Titanic Was Warned

I've discovered that being the leader of anything requires a destination. I can't lead anyone or anything if I don't have an end goal. In my role as executive director there are 111 staff/clients that look to me for direction. They want to know that I am confident that our course is accurate. They need assurance that I have the skill and ability to read the compass and figure out the correct heading.

Our company is creating our next 3 to 5 year plan. Together we have been trying to set a course for our future; not everyone has the same vision for the future. While committee members have had input into the vision of our future it wasn’t until our last meeting that I realized the obvious. The future of the company needs to come from within the company, from those that feel its heartbeat everyday and travel the daily course.

There are many courses that we can choose to follow, worthy goals, each with a different set of parameters on how to get there. Someone needs to figure out which set of parameters to use. It’s my responsibility to gather quality input, crunch number, take surveys and pray. But ultimately I determine the course, lay in the heading and establish an end destination that everyone can commit to and believe in.

Why am I telling you this?

What happens if I’m not prepared to steer the ship into the future?

As I wrote this blog I came across a news article about a cruise line accident in 2006. This was the findings of the investigation into the incident.

Federal investigators blamed a crew member's steering error for sending a cruise ship into a dangerous roll shortly after it left Port Canaveral in July 2006 -- an at-sea accident that injured nearly 300 people. As the automatic pilot found its course back to New York, it started making a left turn when the person in charge on the bridge, the second officer, noticed the ship's automatic pilot needle was far to the left. The officer perceived a problem, "panicked," then took the ship out of automatic pilot thinking the meter was showing that the ship was turning too sharply to one side. But instead of turning the Crown Princess back to the right, the second officer began turning the wheel several times -- including further left instead of back the other way – causing the ship to make an even sharper left hand turn, listing nearly 24 degrees. The second officer's steering "led to vessel responses that he did not expect, did not understand and was therefore unable to correct," the National Transportation Safety Board determined after a year-and-a-half investigation.

That statement hit me between the eyes. The crew member thought (incorrectly) there was a problem. Acting upon his incorrect assumption he made the situation worse. He reacted to what he saw in front of him. He thought he had a problem and he panicked. Because he didn't understand how the system worked he thought he was steering back on course, when in reality his course was true and steady.

I’ve laid in the course, set the compass and engaged in steering the ship. With God’s help I am reading all the dials and gages properly and steering a true course.

Then the storm hits.

Here is the blog tip of the day.

When the storm hits, you need to be just as sure of your destination as when the waters were calm!

If you panic you will read the gages incorrectly and steer off course.

Proverbs 16:9 In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.

Even the Titanic had warning of icebergs ahead.

Kim Angela

The Grateful Dead

Years ago I was driving along wondering (see previous blog: I Wonder As I Wander), reading the bumper stickers on the cars as I went by. As I zoomed past a van covered in dancing psychedelic teddy bears with red & blue skulls it hit me, -- Who exactly is the Grateful Dead?

Drugs, sex, rock n' roll, The Wall of Sound, Dead Heads, Jerry Garcia, yes I do know the band. But who are the grateful dead?

Perhaps this isn't the most spiritual, enlightened blog I've done, but this statement replays itself in my head requiring me to answer the question. Who are the grateful dead?

Here are my questions:
Do you think that everyone that dies is grateful they are dead?
Do you think everyone that has asked Jesus to come into their heart is grateful when they die?
Do you think everyone that is in heaven is grateful in the reward they have received?
Will I be grateful when I'm dead?

I can hear you rushing to the comment section. Why Kim, of course you'll be grateful, you'll be in heaven. You'll be in the presence of Jesus so nothing else will mater. You'll be to busy praising the Lord to care. I'll buy all those statements and agree with you. However...here is where it gets a little heavy.

I know that I can be saved yet l have a sinful nature that I have to overcome. I'm on that journey to overcome that nature. (See previous blog I Haven't Arrived But I've Left. )

Galatians 5:19-20 (NLT) When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, your lives will produce these evil results: sexual immorality, impure thoughts, eagerness for lustful pleasure, idolatry, participation in demonic activities, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, divisions, the feeling that everyone is wrong except those in your own little group, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other kinds of sin.

We may not be struggling with wild orgies, but notice Paul lumps resentment, aggression, anger, arguing, jealousy, bigotry and exclusiveness/racism in with the 'big' sins.

Why is it so difficult for us Christians to admit, or recognize sin and things in our life that shouldn't be there? It seems that as long as we don't have the 'biggie sins' in our life we think everything is okay. The 'lessor sins' Paul lists we prefer to explain away as our human nature or our personality rather than our sinful nature or our sinful personality. OUCH!

I've had this discussion with a friend whose response was, "we can't be perfect". Perfect is an over used word, I wish we could get back to using the word Christ-like.

Galatians 5:21-22 (NLT)When the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

I want to be Christ-like in an environment that is overflowing with sinful nature. I'm praying and believing that the Holy Spirit is helping me replace the sinful things of Gal 5:19-20 with the Christ-like things of Galatians 5:22-23.

If I die with aspects of the sinful nature of Galatians 5:19-20, what happens when I get to heaven where there is no sin?
Does my sin meter just automatically go back to zero when I reach the pearly gates?
Does the sin meter go back to zero when I get to heaven with a sin score of less than 3?
What if my sin meter is more than 3?

So back to the original question. Who are the grateful dead?
How can I be gratefully dead?

This I do know, the lower my sinful nature meter when I get to the pearly gates the more grateful I'll be.

Rock On Dead Heads
(p.s. WWJD)

Kim Angela


Authors Note: Okay all you theological friends, I'm open to your comments and discussions.

White Envelope Moments

While the intention of my blog is to share my journey with the Lord, I also want to be an encouragement to others. My journey to become a Galatians 5 woman has taken me over many paths, molding me into who I am today. Since the response to the Bag Lady blogs was very kind, I thought that I'd share a few more white envelope moments I've experienced along the path of life.

White envelope moments are events or happenings that impact your life because you or someone else did something that made a difference. In the Bag Lady blog I shared about difficult financial times my family experienced in the late '70's that were impacted by a white envelope moment. I'd like to share the first white envelope moment from that time in our life.


The reality of bankruptcy sunk in as vehicles were repossessed and cash flow dried up. Life as we knew it was ending, but my Mom was praying. She tells how one day being very anxious and worried about the bankruptcy she simply prayed the following, "Lord, please have someone put something, anything in a white envelope and give it to me. Then I'll know that you'll bring us through this storm." A few days later close friends, Haven & Madeline, invited my parents out for coffee, picking them up at the house as we had no working vehicle. At the end of the evening Madeline handed Mom a white envelope, inside was a twenty dollar bill. Here was a couple that didn't have $20 to spare, yet felt compelled by the Lord to put it in a white envelope and give it to their friends. They listened and acted upon what the Lord told them to do.

What if they hadn't listened to the Lord? After all what is $20 in a white envelope when we needed thousands to resolve the bankruptcy? That white envelope with $20 was the answer and sign to our family that no matter what the circumstances looked like, God was going to bring us though.

It doesn't have to be money.

Last month I offered to write copy for a friend's project. While I don't have his gifting I was able to use my gifting to provide assistance. It didn't cost me anything but a bit of my time. A few weeks after the project I was talking to his wife, she referred to the copy I wrote as another little white envelope for them. You know, I hadn't thought about it but it was a white envelope answer to a need they had.

It doesn't even have to be in a white envelope.

Don't assume that white envelope moments have to come dressed up as a white envelope with a hundred dollars inside. Last week a friend sent me an email 'hug' on a day when I really needed to know that someone besides my family was thinking about me. It was a white envelope moment.

I've mentioned in a previous blog there are two types of people reading this blog:

1. Those that need a white envelope moment.
2. Those that can provide a white envelope moment.

Of course there may be a third type ~ those that fall into both groups.

God is able. He is God of the impossible & the possible. Yet, He still needs our assistance. While he is capable of creating money from plain paper, a true story for another blog, that isn't the norm. The Lord needs you to fulfill someone else's white envelope need.

Have you ever felt impressed to call a friend? Did you think you should have sent a "Hi" email to a family member? Have you felt like you need to pray for your co-worker? Are you to bake cookies for your new neighbor? Nothing is a coincidence in God's Kingdom. That nudge to do something is from Him, don't blow it off.


Currently I have a number of friends that are in need of white envelope moments. There are sick children, ill parents, pregnancy needs and the jobless all in need of a moment. After reviewing their circumstances they may want to give in to the three D's: defeat, despair & despondency. On the surface it would appear that there is nothing in the natural that you or I can do to fix the problem. I wanted to encourage you that your white envelope moment is on its way. When it arrives it may not resolve your situation, but it is a concrete reminder that God is in control, working out every detail and He knows where you live.


My journey with the Lord is more than an a few hours spent with a group of people in a building. I want my journey with the Lord to be characterized by how I handle the white envelope moments in my life. The peace and confidence to know my Jesus will meet my need with a white envelope moment and the discernment to know when I'm supposed to supply a white envelope moment.

White envelope anyone?

Kim Angela
Authors Note: I would love to hear about your white envelope needs & your white envelope moments.

Did Your Vote Count?

Whatever your political leaning, things sure are interesting. Odd, but it reminds me of the church.

Voters/Constituents = Church Attenders that have a stake in the outcome but don't have a vote that counts.

Super Delegates = Church Members that get to vote.

Closed Primaries = Church Members Only Club.

Platform = A document stating the aims and principals of the party (The Bible).

One of my favorite words: Gerrymandering, this is when they redraw the district boundaries to have an electoral advantage.

Gerrymandering = When those that are against ______(fill in the blank with whatever you want) gather all their family & friends that haven't been at church in ages, but are still eligible to vote, so they can 'redraw' the district and swing the vote.

As Americans/Canadians we are asked to vote for the candidate that we think will best resolve the issues. However when the candidate becomes head of the party and doesn't resolve the issues it's the voters/constituents turn to flip-flop.

Ah yes, another wonderful political term. Flip-flop = a sudden change in position on an issue.

This is my real soap box: I'm tired of people voting for Jesus, then flip-flopping on the issue.

Where is the power of the Holy Spirit in our churches to convict us of the sin in our life? Where is the power of the Holy Spirit in our churches to change the lives of hurting people? Where is the Holy Spirit in my life to demonstrate His power to others?

People come into our churches or across our path and we convince them that they should give Jesus a try; so they raise their hand at the end of the service and vote for Him. But when they've tried Jesus and determine it doesn't 'work' for them, they rescind their vote. There are still others that will continue to flip-flop on the Jesus issue based on their circumstances. These are the folks that made Jesus Lord of their emergencies, not Lord of their life.

There are Christians that have voted for Jesus, yet they never bothered to read the platform or sign up for party membership. I'm not talking church membership. I talking about when you are so steadfast and unswerving in your commitment that you'll become a card carrying member of the organization. Your belief in the organization is so strong that you'll do whatever it takes to see its mission accomplished. They voted, but they didn't sign up.

At five years old when knelt in front of the TV while the Billy Graham crusade filtered into our living room and accepted Jesus as my Savior I did more than lift my hand and vote for the best option. I fell in love with Jesus and became a card carrying member.

If true revival brings repentance, what does true repentance bring?

Ellison Research, in Phoenix conducted research for the 2004 September/October issue of LifeWay's Facts & Trends magazine. It reported on the following statement:

"Regardless of what other faiths believe, Jesus Christ is the only path to salvation."

• 88 percent of pastors of Protestant churches said they agree strongly with the statement.
• 96 percent of pastors associated with the National Association of Evangelicals agreed strongly
• 65 percent of pastors associated with the National Council of Churches agreed strongly

When broken down to denominations, those that agreed strongly with the statement looked like this:

• 100 percent of Pentecostal ministers
• 98 percent of Southern Baptist ministers
• 77 percent of Lutherans ministers
• 65 percent of Methodists ministers

You've got to be kidding, not even all the nation's pastors are preaching repentance. I'm so tired of the Super Delegates watering down the platform so it can be voter friendly!(Just in case you missed it: Christians watering down the Word so as to not scare away the lost.)

Let me say here that I am a very happy part of a pentecostal church (Assemblies of God)where the pastor and congregation want to see the Holy Spirit move BIG and change lives~ our own and those of the lost.

The Jesus I know changes & guides my life daily. As a card carrying member:

I want the Jesus I give to others to be so powerful and meaningful there will never be a question of a flip-flop.

I want to see hurting people encounter the power of God.

I want the church and the lost to know that He is God of their impossible.

I want the church and the lost to know they can expect God to change their life and meet their needs.

I want to see voters, constituents & super delegates that boldly believe their platform is true and that it transforms lives.

I want to see people stand up for their beliefs and be counted for Jesus.

I want the Holy Spirit to be so BIG in my life and the life of the church that voter turn out sets records.

Time to sign up for the party membership, not just cast a vote.

Kim Angela

Less of Me

Philippians 3:10 That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death.

For all those that claim this as their life scripture, I'm impressed. I would have preferred something a little more upbeat like 2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things, at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

Blessing and abundance sell much better than suffering and death.

Philippians 3:10 is a scripture that we love to quote half a verse, 'That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection', leaving off the bits about sufferings and death. Yet if we could grasp Philippians 3:10 it would revolutionize our life, our family, our church and the world. You might think that's a whopper of a statement, and it is, in terms of life changing. It changed my life.

I remember where I was when I first prayed this passage of scripture.

I remember what was happening when I decided I shouldn't have prayed this scripture.

I know who I am thanks to having prayed this scripture.

My Christian heritage is rich. From early childhood I have been intimately acquainted with God's Glory, His miraculous healing power, the provision God has for us and even the ability to make something out of nothing. As I grew I felt that I knew God, little did I know that I was merely acquainted with the tip of his little finger. It was like saying I knew all about the United States because I'd visited Delaware.

Just after turning 30 I began to ask God for more of Him in my life. I felt that my walk with Him had become stagnant, stale and predictably routine. Missing was the intimate moments with God and the miraculous seemed to have vanished. Then I had an a-ha moment when I made two decisions that changed my life.

1. I was born to worship God. I will choose to worship Him no matter how I feel, no matter my circumstances or situation, no matter how boring the service. After all God is bigger than all those things.

2. I want to have the Fruit of the Spirit be in evident in my life in all things. A Galatians 5 Woman.

I began to pray Philippians 3:10. Lord, I want to have more of you and less of me in my life. I want to become acquainted with your presence and power. Lord, I know that the Fruit of the Spirit can only mature in my life when there are difficult situations that allow it to grow. After all love, joy and peace are easy to have when everything is going your way. I can even recall the road I was driving down when I finally said to the Lord, "God if I pray this prayer and mean it, I know what will happen", referring to the portion on suffering. "God I want to know you, your power and your presence and if I need to mature and die to my old nature to do it, I'm ready."

Let me tell you....be sure you are ready before you pray that one.

For the next three years life went along comfortably. My love relationship with Jesus grew through my worship and I began to see some of the old nature (pride, anger, etc) grow smaller. Then God kicked it up a notch. Please remember that God doesn't have bad things to give out, but sometimes bad things do happen to us. This is prime time to allow Him to work in us, teaching us to rely on Him and display His nature.

In a span of 24 months I:

1. Had kidney stones 3 times.

2. Got a divorce because my husband decided he'd rather live an alternative life style.

3. Ended up with $19,000 worth of debt from the marriage.

4. Discovered I had elevated calcium levels causing the kidney stones; elevated due to one growth on my parathyroid gland and one on my thyroid gland.

5. The two growths were wrapped around and pressing on my vocal chords causing me to lose my voice. My voice would give out after fifteen minutes, and singing was out of the question.

6. The required surgery called for them to cut my vocal chords, which could result in damaging my voice and losing the ability to sing.

7. The non-profit company I run was hauled into court by disgruntled parents charging that we were abusive and neglecting their adult children. This one made the AP news wire with a national story about me allegedly abusing our clients.

Now, ask me about the fellowship of his sufferings.

All were situations that I had no control over and could not fix despite my own efforts. I had to rely totally on Him to see me through. One of the many prayers I prayed during the 24 months was, "God, whatever lesson I'm supposed to learn through all this please let me learn the first time through." They were difficult times. But God was there.

Would I choose to live those 24 months again? No. But I will never regret living those 24 months and wouldn't change a thing. You see in those 24 months when it seemed that everything was crashing and burning, I worshiped Jesus no matter what it looked like. When it seemed that the situation couldn't get worse, yet is did, I met every moment with the love, joy and peace of the Lord. A lot of the old me died during those 24 months; the new me is thanks to Jesus.

Three years have passed since the end of my 24 months. Looking at it through man's eyes you'd say that all things resolved. I'm a debt free, happy single woman that owns two homes. My signing voice is richer and stronger than before the surgery. As their case fell apart the lawsuit was dismissed and the disgruntled people left the agency. The company is more prosperous than before the trouble began, receiving an award from the state for quality programming.

Looking at it through God's eyes, it was Him that brought miraculous resolution to every situation. I am not the same person that started this journey eight years ago. I have been transformed through the death to me process. There is less of me and more of Him.

Three Sundays ago I stood in the choir loft and prayed, "God I need to know you more, whatever the cost. God I do understand what I'm saying and what that might means, and I want more of you no matter what comes my way."

Stay Tuned. God isn't finished with me yet.

Kim Angela

Lessons From the Bag Lady Part 2: The Blue Honda

Dorothy is real and the story is true.

My parents read the Bag Lady blog after it was posted. They informed me that I hadn't remembered the story quite right. Here is the amended version.

That night as my Dad helped Dorothy gather her bags she turned to him, handing him a white envelope saying, "The Lord told me you needed money". Dad thanked her and put the white envelope on the table and drove Dorothy home. When he got back to the house he opened the white envelope. Inside the white envelope Dorothy had given them the thousands they needed, within $80 of the exact amount.

While Dorothy, the bag lady, saved our home and business property, which we still own, it didn't stop the bankruptcy. The next few years were difficult as our family struggled to regain our financial footing. There would be more white envelope moments from what the world/church would call the unlovely people that my parents had helped over the years that came at just the right moment.

Ecclesiastes 11:1-2 Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again. Give portions to seven, yes to eight, for you do not know what disaster may come upon the land.

While Dorothy taught me many life lessons another white envelope moment taught me a God lesson.

The Blue Honda

My grandfather was a man of many colorful words. One of my favorite quotes was apropos to our family situation after the bankruptcy. "Being broke isn't embarrassing, it's just inconvenient." Gone were the work trucks, gone were the fancy luxury cars, leaving us with one beat up truck that would leave you on the road. Being left on the road in the middle of winter in Canada is not a good idea.

After a youth outing on a Saturday night my Mom had no way of picking me up as my Dad had our truck at work. Very Inconvenient. The pastor's wife, a good friend, offered to give me a ride home. At home she came in and had tea with us. Sitting in the living room we began to discuss the vehicle situation, actually the lack thereof. During the conversation she turned to my Mom and asked, "If you could have any car you wanted what would it be?" Mom replied, "A Honda because it's good on gas". Adding my two cents I said, "And I'd like it to be blue."

After church the following morning my Dad was standing in the foyer chatting with Charlie, a retired friend. Charlie asked my Dad, "We've noticed Darlene & Kim walking to church (we lived 2 blocks from the church) and hadn't noticed her car in the parking lot." It had been a car you couldn't miss, a big black four-door Lincoln, a mafia type ride. Dad explained that times were a little tough and the car had gone in the bankruptcy so we were walking. Without even missing a beat Charlie replied, "Kay and I are leaving tomorrow for Arizona and we'll be gone the entire winter. I'll just drop off the wife's car for them to use this winter."

An hour before Sunday evening service Charlie & Kay arrived at our doorstep with keys in hand. A wave of emotions overwhelmed us, there sitting in our yard was a blue Honda.

There are two types of people reading this blog.

• Those that are in need of a white envelope moment.


• Those that can supply a white envelope moment.

If you are in need of a white envelope moment, He has heard every prayer and cry of your heart. God knows exactly where you live!

If you can supply a white envelope moment open your heart to hear the Lord is telling you to do. A bag of groceries, $5, a gift card, a thinking of you card in the mail; it doesn't have to be thousands it just has to be something.


What was my God lesson? We need to listen to the prompting of the Lord; we may be God's answer to someone's prayer.


Lord, create white envelope moments.


Kim Angela