What is Your Oxygen Saturation Level?

Her fingers and lips were blue. Her skin was an ashy grey. Everything about Mary was blue-grey. If you met Mary you’d have noticed her unhealthy color, but her daily routine wouldn’t have given away her medical condition.

Our friend Mary lived with an oxygen level of 64%. Over the years Mary’s body began to adapt to the 64% level by restricting the amount of oxygen flowing to her extremities and skin, salvaging as much as it could for brain function. Mary worked as a nurse, providing patient care in the days when that meant lifting, turning and tugging. She enjoyed gardening and boating. Living a normal life, Mary and her body adapted, functioning below the full requirement of oxygen a body needs. At 64% you & I would be passed out on the floor from lack of oxygen.

In order for us to function at our best capacity we need to have greater than 90% oxygen in our blood. When the oxygen levels in your blood begin to dip into the 80% range your brain is lacking the oxygen it needs and grey cells begin to die.

Eighteen years ago Mary had a full heart and lung transplant.

I remember the first time I saw her after the transplant – she was pink.

Mary described how she felt. After years of her body adapting to the lack of life giving oxygen the physical sensation of having enough oxygen for ALL parts of her body was like experiencing new life. She talked about how much more she could do and accomplish with the new heart & lungs providing her a complete supply of oxygen. She realized that while she thought her life was full, she had no idea what she had been missing. Life with a 90% oxygen level afforded Mary a new level of functioning.

Think of God’s Glory/Presence in our life as an oxygen level.

We can function at a 64% level. Acceptable, if we adapt. Like Mary, we could live our entire life at 64% and be happy.

If you are on this journey with the Lord I pray that you’ve had God moments when you sensed and experienced life at a little higher %. A great worship service, around the altar after a message, a prayer time; a moment when you knew that you had come into contact with God’s Glory/Presence. It’s in these moments when a little higher % make us both hungry for more and discouraged with the knowledge of what little we have.

After Mary’s double transplant she was so susceptible to infection and germs that she wasn’t allowed in public for six months. Her family had to wear masks and limit their exposure to her, even within their own home. There was great concern that the transplant, which brought a new oxygen level, would be rejected should she be exposed to any contaminant, germ or disease. Prior to and after the transplant Mary’s doctor’s infused her with anti-rejection drugs. Taking medicine, designed to equip her body to be receptive to the new organs, improved Mary’s chances of being successful. No matter how many anti-rejection drugs the doctors gave Mary it was still up to her to monitor her exposure to germs. The years of waiting, the pain of surgery and the months of isolation would have been for naught had she let down her guard and allowed herself to be exposed to germs.

Like Mary, we can begin making preparation to go to a new level. There is a life in Jesus that can consistently be lived higher than a 64% level. In the parable of the sower Jesus taught that some would develop thirty (64% oxygen), some would develop sixty (80% oxygen) and some a hundred (90% oxygen).

Mark 4:8 Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up, grew and produced a crop, multiplying thirty, sixty, or even a hundred times."

Be encouraged, there is more beyond the 64% level.

Be encouraged, exposing yourself to God’s presence and His Glory will change the atmosphere and environment around you.

Be encouraged, we are to grow strong in the private place before emerging to the public place.

Be encouraged, your oxygen/glory level is rising.


Kim Angela

Authors Note:Mary is fine and doing well.

Lessons My Grandfather Taught Me: You Can't Sell From an Empty Truck

Arching oak trees line the street as white picket fences stand sentry in front of the shuttered bungalows. Two streets over a lonely dog barks at the back door wanting inside. The chug of the truck is heard in the early morning light as the faithful milkman makes his deliveries. Brakes squeal as he halts in front of your house. Through the gloomy dawn he walks up to your door, bringing the anticipated refreshment. As his foot touches the step, he halts, realizing he has come from the dairy with only one bottle of milk. You ordered three bottles and a pint of cream; your order won’t be fulfilled. His truck & carrier are empty.

Most of us are too young to recall the idyllic days of milkmen and house calls by doctors, yet all were part of my grandfather's day. You would have called my grandfather colorful...a man of many quips, most of which I can't publish. A self-made man (with help from my grandmother), the majority of his life was spent in some aspect of the automotive industry. From a parts salesman to a Texaco Star gas station owner he worked hard and created a reputation as an astute business man. Many of his sayings continue to echo in my ears, this was one of my favorite:

You Can't Sell From an Empty Truck

Being a business owner my grandfather ran his business with this understanding, he had the best product in town, gave the best service and everyone needed what he had to offer.

A few weeks ago I fell into a conversation about witnessing. I'm not one to corner people to share my faith. I'd rather live my life in such a manner that those around me see I've got something they need; reminiscent of my grandfather's business practice. As we discussed ways to participate in outreach I shared my grandfather's adage of the empty truck -- I don't think they understood the correlation.

Being a Christian is like being a small business owner -- you have something that someone else needs.

Being a Christian is like being a successful salesman – you fully believe your product is the best option, you are intimately acquainted with your product and you have plenty of product on hand.

Being a Christian is like being the spokesperson for an ad campaign – you need to be using the product you’re hocking, making a marked improvement in your life.

Being a Christian is like being a satisfied customer -- the product is such a blessing in your life that its merits and benefits ooze out of every pore, at every opportunity, without even trying, to whoever is around.

Like the milkman of days gone by, I want my truck to be full of product so I can meet the needs of my customers.

Beyond Your Mission Statement

I’ve missed glorious connections because I’ve been too busy doing good things.

Allow me to define my idea of a glorious connection; a person, experience or opportunity that brings a maturing to my spirit. It may be an open door, a life-long benefactor or even a difficult situation, each connection bringing a transformation in me that shows forth His glory.

A number of us are involved in either a non-profit, a ministry or a church. We are in the business of helping people, seeing lives transformed and in general, improving the world. Actually, every Christian is in that business. The mission statements of these organizations tell people that we are busy about the business of being life changers.

How does a helping organization go beyond its own mission statement? (How does a household go beyond its boundaries?)

In twenty years of working at a non-profit organization I’ve never had matching office furniture, until now. A seed of kindness planted came back as a blessing last month.

Standing in our parking lot as the movers unloaded two truck-loads of furniture, I marveled at God’s goodness and provision. Several years earlier I had offered a job to someone in need. Eventually they moved on to their dream job, but not before learning of the behind the scenes cost cutting measures a small non-profit is faced with daily.

A moment of going beyond our own mission statement set us up for a blessing.

When BMCFerrell moved into their new facility their old office furniture went into storage. As they conducted a search for a worthy charity to donate the items, it was our personal glorious connection that brought us to their attention. Our former staff enlightened BMCFerrell to our program and our need. You might not get excited over 1990’s floral conference chairs; however, when your conference chairs are 1970’s yellow, floral looks great.

We all believe that God will supply for our every need. Many of us vividly recall the days of having faith to believe that the check was in today’s mail. To keep the household/ministry operating and the doors open we have to generate finances. However it isn’t healthy for us to always be on the receiving end of the giving chain. Look for opportunities to put yourself on the other end of the chain.

Whether you choose to quote from Ecclesiastes 11, Cast your bread upon the water… or Luke 6 Give and it will be given unto you…, there is an adage we must remember. One good turn deserves another.

Don’t miss a glorious connection.

Go beyond your mission statement.

Kim Angela

p.s. I also painted my office from raspberry pink to a classy golden brown. Yeah!

(What) IF... by Rudyard Kipling & Kim Kipling-Falcon

If Christianity....

A few years ago I had a wonderful friend that was turning 13. His parents asked for words of encouragement from various friends and family members to share.

What I sent Nathaniel is valid for all of us.

Dear Nathaniel,

When I was your age I discovered this poem written by Rudyard Kipling, best known for being one of our relatives -- oh yes, and the author of titles such as The Jungle Book and Kim.

It was during one of those in-between stages -- you know -- to old to hang with the little kids, but not old enough to be considered a teenager, that I read this over & over until I understood each line and it took hold inside of me as character.

Here is Auntie Kim's version with a touch of Jesus included -the words in bold are my addition.

IF by Rudyard Kipling/Kim Kipling Falcon

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, (Peace)
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,(Confidence)
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,(Patience)
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,(Honesty)
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,(Love)
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise; (Humility)

If you can dream--and not make dreams your master, (Realist)
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim; (Wisdom)
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;(Even Tempered)
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,(Calmness)
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools: (Perseverance)

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings (Adventurous)
And never breath a word about your loss;(No Self Pity)
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!" (Determination)

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,(Mind Set on Him/Holiness/In the World, Not Of the World)
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,(Humbleness)
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; (Secure)

If all men count with you, but none too much,(Steadfast)
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run, (Effort)

Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Godly Man, my son!

Nathaniel,

Who you are has already been formed. Who you become is still open to options.

Always apply Galatians 5:21-23 to every situation and circumstance.

The fruit of the Spirit, which His presence within us, is love, joy, peace, an even temper, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

Jesus said you will know who loves and follows me by the fruit they have in their life.

Always display the fruit!

Character is not only made in a crisis -- but it is exhibited.

Much Love, Prayers and Blessings,
xoxo
Auntie Kim


What if.....

Kim Angela

p.s. For the video lovers this is "IF" recited by this year's Wimbeldon finalists.

To Judge Or Not To Judge

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Matthew 7:1-2(NIV)

Jesus meant this! I did find a modern translation of Matthew 7:1-2.

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. Unless of course you think that you’re right or smarter or better off, or older or.... …than me; then it’s okay to judge others in that scenario.

Alright, perhaps that isn’t found in any translation; however, as Christians isn’t that how we act?

We all tend to judge. One of the differences is how wise we are in allowing our judgments to surface. Those of you that are wise and can keep your lips sealed are able to keep judgments internal. Those of us that sometimes speak before we think tend to have our thoughts/judgments spread out before men for the whole to see.

My BFF is one of those people that can keep her judgments quiet and on the inside. I, on the other hand, tend to speak my mind. Decades of friendship later we joke that I speak what she thinks. The world around us sees her as this quiet, gentle spirit (which she is) and they see me as this outspoken chic (which I am).

If God looks on the heart, I don’t suppose it matters to Him whether my judgments are internal or external. It’s still a judgment.

In my teens the group I hung with tended to be judgmental. Our humor was sharp, witty, cutting and judgmental. I believe that we all had good hearts, but we were the poster children for the modified Matthew 7:2. We thought of ourselves as smarter, brighter, cooler, more together etc. If anyone, including a member of our group for some reason didn’t measure up we jumped all over it.

Nearly three decades later, oh how I wish I could have a do-over on those years.

Many variables combine to create the standard against which we judge people; heritage, beliefs, doctrine and experience to name a few.

Warning: Transparency Content (Again):

My variables caused me to judge divorced people.
Then I got a divorce. (See Blog: Less of Me)
I don’t judge divorced people anymore.
Sometimes divorce is the only answer.
If you’d like to debate (judge) the matter based on your variables, feel free to do so.

On our jobs, at our church or around the dinner table, judgments are everywhere.

A couple of weeks ago a few of us were emailing back and forth, encouraging each other and sharing what God had been speaking to our hearts. In one of the emails a friend responded with, ‘Thank you for not judging me in moments of vulnerability.’

I thought about this as I wrote this blog. Then the Holy Spirit started to speak to my heart.

I have many acquaintances and few friends. For my true heart friends, I know all about them, and they me, and we still love each other anyway. We make allowances for off days and love them through it. When my friend wrote about not judging in a moment of vulnerability my internal response was, ‘of course not, you are my friend and wouldn’t think of it.’

Then the Holy Spirit asked me if I am as non-judgmental of an acquaintance or a stranger as I am of my friends and family.

Internal judgments are insidious. We may simply glance at the person in the next cubicle or the next pew over and say, ‘well, they aren’t…….’

Judgment Alert!

The most insidious judgments I make are those that are cloaked in care.

We’ve all been there. It’s when we look at someone and think that they could do better, be better or accomplish more if only they would….. We rationalize it by wrapping it in concern for their well being, but in actuality, deep down we are making a judgment thinking that they are not measuring up to where we think they need to be.

Just when I think I’ve arrived at a great God destination the Holy Spirit puts His finger on something else. (See Blog: I Haven't Arrived, But I've Left)

Kim Angela

iPray ~ 24/7 (You Tube Video Must See)

The room is charged with excitement about a new opportunity. The opportunity is sure to make a change in our life and in the life of our church. Many have already signed up to participate.

iPray ~ 24/7

This is an opportunity to be part of a prayer chain that will hold up our church & its leaders for 7 days, 24 hours a day. This is a concerted, organized prayer effort to effect a transformation in our lives and hence in the life of our church. Participants sign up for a specific 30 minute window, daily during the week.

This week my church started our iPray week on Sunday at noon and we’ll go through to next Sunday at noon. Being an active part of our Music Department, along with others we signed up for more than one slot daily. It is the intention of the Music Department to fill every slot with someone from our department – we made it.

Warning: Transparency Content

How do I really feel knowing that tonight I am facing 2 one hour prayer slots? Gone is the excitement filled room. Group mentality has faded being replaced with lone pray-er status. Friends with other time slots are at home, watching their favorite show while I’m about to embark on my first hour of the evening prayer time.

There was a time in the not too distant past that an hour of prayer would have been unthinkable, let alone two hours in the same evening. Prayer was something I did in my car on the way to work. Prayer was something I did in the shower every morning. My prayer life could be summed up in a 15 minute car ride or a 5 minute shower.

Sure there were times when prayer lasted longer thrown in with a little fasting; but mostly because there was a ministry event coming up. I fervently sought God when I needed Him to show up and chatted with Him cordially the remainder of the time.

No more!

Five years ago I woke up to the fact that, apparently I really didn’t have the faith to believe that what the Word says and says about me is true. After all, if I really believed what the Word says I’d act different, talk different and be different.

I went from the logos of the word to the rhema of the word. Or in English that is, I went from knowing it in my head to believing in my heart!

In the late 1940’s my great aunt asked her pastor if she and her friends could stay in the church and pray as they were desperate for a touch from the Lord. For 11 days and 11 nights the ladies stayed at a little Assemblies of God church in Regina, Saskatchewan until God visited them. He did, in a BIG way.

In the 70’s & 80’s it was common place in my home to see people from all churches across the city in our living room praying.

So here I am in the 2000’s carrying on the Godly heritage of prayer that has been passed down my family line. Not because it’s what I’m supposed to, but because it’s what I want to.

This past Thursday, July 3rd I went to Dallas to be part of a service conduct by Todd Bentley. Todd is the evangelist at the Florida Outpouring Revival going on at Ignite Church, an Assemblies of God church pastored by Steven Strader in Lakeland. As the miracle power of God began to move across the meeting I was transported back to my childhood sitting in healing services of Kathryn Kulhman and Morris Cerello.

I had driven 240 miles because I wanted to be in the presence of God. I wanted to receive a touch of God’s power and anointing. As I stood to worship with the 10,000 gathered (that was cool!) I heard the Lord speak to me.

“What you are looking for can’t be found in this coliseum. What you are looking for is found in your own prayer closet.”

Ouch.

Well, God is always right. I was/am looking for the power of the Holy Ghost. I am looking to be so full of the power of the Holy Ghost that flows out of me naturally. I want to be a 1st Century Christian ~ a bold, full of power, witness for the Lord. Just to set the record straight there aren’t people lining up to have my shadow fall on them. (Acts 5:15 As a result, people brought the sick into the streets and laid them on beds and mats so that at least Peter's shadow might fall on some of them as he passed by.)

What I want isn’t found by getting in line to see what is being handed out.
What I want is found by getting alone with the Lord and praying.

Wait, I’ll be right back… my first one hour slot of the evening is starting.



Okay, I’m back. That was great. Where was I…?

You never know what is going to happen when you pray. Last night as I prayed my favorite Psalm, #27 the Lord opened my eyes to see verses in a new light. Tonight I cranked my music and began to pray and worship Him. I got to song #4 and God showed up. All of a sudden a song that I’ve heard and sung dozens of times took on a fresh revelation about the words and how it pertains to this current iPray 24/7 event.

As you read the words to this song think of my church’s iPray 24/7 event. From teenagers to 80 year olds, every generation is praying for a transformation in us and in our church. We want to see God’s power move in order to change lives. We want our lives to be changed.


Lord, hear our cry
Come heal our land
Breath life into these dry and thirsty souls
Lord, hear our prayer
Forgive our sin
And as we call on your name
Would you make this a place
For your glory to dwell

Chorus:
Open the blind eyes
Unlock the deaf ears
Come to your people
As we draw near
Hear us from heaven
Touch our generation
We are your people
Crying out in desperation

Bridge:
Hear us from heaven,
Hear us from heaven,
Hear us from heaven (4x)



Kim Angela

Captain of My Soul

Keeping with the ship theme...

There are days when you feel like the captain of your ship.
Then there are days when you feel like the porter in 3rd class aboard the Titanic.

As I wrote last week's blog (Even the Titanic had Warning) this quote kept running though my head.

I am the master of my fate.
I am the captain of my soul.

Being the curious type I hunted down the reference and learned a little more about the poem and its author. Like many of our hymns often the back story is just as awe inspiring as the hymn itself.

The author, William Earnest Henley was a prominent publisher in the late 1800’s. Even my ancestor, Rudyard Kipling, looked to Henley to publish many of his works. History does not record if Henley was a man of faith, given the poem I’d have to say Christianity wasn’t on his radar. At the age of 12 Henley fell victim to tuberculosis of the bone. For the next 14 years Henley remained hospitalized, his diseased foot was treated by crude methods resulting in it being amputated directly below the knee. The doctors announced that the only way to save his life would be to amputate the other leg as well. Through Henley’s fight new surgical methods were developed which saved his other leg and life; he lived until the age of 54.

Here is the poem William Earnest Henley wrote while fighting for his life trapped in a hospital bed.

"Invictus"
(Latin for Unconquerable)

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of Circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeoning of Chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

This sounds like a depressed young man that decided not to give up. He had every right to feel like the porter and not the captain.

I’ve been there!

I remain master of my fate, as I have a free will to decided and determine my course. However being an intelligent master, my course is always best left to the captain, Jesus.

How much more can I determine when Jesus is the captain of my soul?

We have the ability to call out to God for assistance in every life situation.

Rough Waters?
Calm Seas?

Did you get bad news this week? Are you feeling like the captain or the porter?

It will be okay. He is the captain of your ship.

If He isn’t, He can be.

He needs to be.

Kim Angela
Author's Note: If you need to make Him your captain and don't know how, email me. We'll talk.

Even the Titanic Was Warned

I've discovered that being the leader of anything requires a destination. I can't lead anyone or anything if I don't have an end goal. In my role as executive director there are 111 staff/clients that look to me for direction. They want to know that I am confident that our course is accurate. They need assurance that I have the skill and ability to read the compass and figure out the correct heading.

Our company is creating our next 3 to 5 year plan. Together we have been trying to set a course for our future; not everyone has the same vision for the future. While committee members have had input into the vision of our future it wasn’t until our last meeting that I realized the obvious. The future of the company needs to come from within the company, from those that feel its heartbeat everyday and travel the daily course.

There are many courses that we can choose to follow, worthy goals, each with a different set of parameters on how to get there. Someone needs to figure out which set of parameters to use. It’s my responsibility to gather quality input, crunch number, take surveys and pray. But ultimately I determine the course, lay in the heading and establish an end destination that everyone can commit to and believe in.

Why am I telling you this?

What happens if I’m not prepared to steer the ship into the future?

As I wrote this blog I came across a news article about a cruise line accident in 2006. This was the findings of the investigation into the incident.

Federal investigators blamed a crew member's steering error for sending a cruise ship into a dangerous roll shortly after it left Port Canaveral in July 2006 -- an at-sea accident that injured nearly 300 people. As the automatic pilot found its course back to New York, it started making a left turn when the person in charge on the bridge, the second officer, noticed the ship's automatic pilot needle was far to the left. The officer perceived a problem, "panicked," then took the ship out of automatic pilot thinking the meter was showing that the ship was turning too sharply to one side. But instead of turning the Crown Princess back to the right, the second officer began turning the wheel several times -- including further left instead of back the other way – causing the ship to make an even sharper left hand turn, listing nearly 24 degrees. The second officer's steering "led to vessel responses that he did not expect, did not understand and was therefore unable to correct," the National Transportation Safety Board determined after a year-and-a-half investigation.

That statement hit me between the eyes. The crew member thought (incorrectly) there was a problem. Acting upon his incorrect assumption he made the situation worse. He reacted to what he saw in front of him. He thought he had a problem and he panicked. Because he didn't understand how the system worked he thought he was steering back on course, when in reality his course was true and steady.

I’ve laid in the course, set the compass and engaged in steering the ship. With God’s help I am reading all the dials and gages properly and steering a true course.

Then the storm hits.

Here is the blog tip of the day.

When the storm hits, you need to be just as sure of your destination as when the waters were calm!

If you panic you will read the gages incorrectly and steer off course.

Proverbs 16:9 In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.

Even the Titanic had warning of icebergs ahead.

Kim Angela

The Grateful Dead

Years ago I was driving along wondering (see previous blog: I Wonder As I Wander), reading the bumper stickers on the cars as I went by. As I zoomed past a van covered in dancing psychedelic teddy bears with red & blue skulls it hit me, -- Who exactly is the Grateful Dead?

Drugs, sex, rock n' roll, The Wall of Sound, Dead Heads, Jerry Garcia, yes I do know the band. But who are the grateful dead?

Perhaps this isn't the most spiritual, enlightened blog I've done, but this statement replays itself in my head requiring me to answer the question. Who are the grateful dead?

Here are my questions:
Do you think that everyone that dies is grateful they are dead?
Do you think everyone that has asked Jesus to come into their heart is grateful when they die?
Do you think everyone that is in heaven is grateful in the reward they have received?
Will I be grateful when I'm dead?

I can hear you rushing to the comment section. Why Kim, of course you'll be grateful, you'll be in heaven. You'll be in the presence of Jesus so nothing else will mater. You'll be to busy praising the Lord to care. I'll buy all those statements and agree with you. However...here is where it gets a little heavy.

I know that I can be saved yet l have a sinful nature that I have to overcome. I'm on that journey to overcome that nature. (See previous blog I Haven't Arrived But I've Left. )

Galatians 5:19-20 (NLT) When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, your lives will produce these evil results: sexual immorality, impure thoughts, eagerness for lustful pleasure, idolatry, participation in demonic activities, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, divisions, the feeling that everyone is wrong except those in your own little group, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other kinds of sin.

We may not be struggling with wild orgies, but notice Paul lumps resentment, aggression, anger, arguing, jealousy, bigotry and exclusiveness/racism in with the 'big' sins.

Why is it so difficult for us Christians to admit, or recognize sin and things in our life that shouldn't be there? It seems that as long as we don't have the 'biggie sins' in our life we think everything is okay. The 'lessor sins' Paul lists we prefer to explain away as our human nature or our personality rather than our sinful nature or our sinful personality. OUCH!

I've had this discussion with a friend whose response was, "we can't be perfect". Perfect is an over used word, I wish we could get back to using the word Christ-like.

Galatians 5:21-22 (NLT)When the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

I want to be Christ-like in an environment that is overflowing with sinful nature. I'm praying and believing that the Holy Spirit is helping me replace the sinful things of Gal 5:19-20 with the Christ-like things of Galatians 5:22-23.

If I die with aspects of the sinful nature of Galatians 5:19-20, what happens when I get to heaven where there is no sin?
Does my sin meter just automatically go back to zero when I reach the pearly gates?
Does the sin meter go back to zero when I get to heaven with a sin score of less than 3?
What if my sin meter is more than 3?

So back to the original question. Who are the grateful dead?
How can I be gratefully dead?

This I do know, the lower my sinful nature meter when I get to the pearly gates the more grateful I'll be.

Rock On Dead Heads
(p.s. WWJD)

Kim Angela


Authors Note: Okay all you theological friends, I'm open to your comments and discussions.

White Envelope Moments

While the intention of my blog is to share my journey with the Lord, I also want to be an encouragement to others. My journey to become a Galatians 5 woman has taken me over many paths, molding me into who I am today. Since the response to the Bag Lady blogs was very kind, I thought that I'd share a few more white envelope moments I've experienced along the path of life.

White envelope moments are events or happenings that impact your life because you or someone else did something that made a difference. In the Bag Lady blog I shared about difficult financial times my family experienced in the late '70's that were impacted by a white envelope moment. I'd like to share the first white envelope moment from that time in our life.


The reality of bankruptcy sunk in as vehicles were repossessed and cash flow dried up. Life as we knew it was ending, but my Mom was praying. She tells how one day being very anxious and worried about the bankruptcy she simply prayed the following, "Lord, please have someone put something, anything in a white envelope and give it to me. Then I'll know that you'll bring us through this storm." A few days later close friends, Haven & Madeline, invited my parents out for coffee, picking them up at the house as we had no working vehicle. At the end of the evening Madeline handed Mom a white envelope, inside was a twenty dollar bill. Here was a couple that didn't have $20 to spare, yet felt compelled by the Lord to put it in a white envelope and give it to their friends. They listened and acted upon what the Lord told them to do.

What if they hadn't listened to the Lord? After all what is $20 in a white envelope when we needed thousands to resolve the bankruptcy? That white envelope with $20 was the answer and sign to our family that no matter what the circumstances looked like, God was going to bring us though.

It doesn't have to be money.

Last month I offered to write copy for a friend's project. While I don't have his gifting I was able to use my gifting to provide assistance. It didn't cost me anything but a bit of my time. A few weeks after the project I was talking to his wife, she referred to the copy I wrote as another little white envelope for them. You know, I hadn't thought about it but it was a white envelope answer to a need they had.

It doesn't even have to be in a white envelope.

Don't assume that white envelope moments have to come dressed up as a white envelope with a hundred dollars inside. Last week a friend sent me an email 'hug' on a day when I really needed to know that someone besides my family was thinking about me. It was a white envelope moment.

I've mentioned in a previous blog there are two types of people reading this blog:

1. Those that need a white envelope moment.
2. Those that can provide a white envelope moment.

Of course there may be a third type ~ those that fall into both groups.

God is able. He is God of the impossible & the possible. Yet, He still needs our assistance. While he is capable of creating money from plain paper, a true story for another blog, that isn't the norm. The Lord needs you to fulfill someone else's white envelope need.

Have you ever felt impressed to call a friend? Did you think you should have sent a "Hi" email to a family member? Have you felt like you need to pray for your co-worker? Are you to bake cookies for your new neighbor? Nothing is a coincidence in God's Kingdom. That nudge to do something is from Him, don't blow it off.


Currently I have a number of friends that are in need of white envelope moments. There are sick children, ill parents, pregnancy needs and the jobless all in need of a moment. After reviewing their circumstances they may want to give in to the three D's: defeat, despair & despondency. On the surface it would appear that there is nothing in the natural that you or I can do to fix the problem. I wanted to encourage you that your white envelope moment is on its way. When it arrives it may not resolve your situation, but it is a concrete reminder that God is in control, working out every detail and He knows where you live.


My journey with the Lord is more than an a few hours spent with a group of people in a building. I want my journey with the Lord to be characterized by how I handle the white envelope moments in my life. The peace and confidence to know my Jesus will meet my need with a white envelope moment and the discernment to know when I'm supposed to supply a white envelope moment.

White envelope anyone?

Kim Angela
Authors Note: I would love to hear about your white envelope needs & your white envelope moments.

Did Your Vote Count?

Whatever your political leaning, things sure are interesting. Odd, but it reminds me of the church.

Voters/Constituents = Church Attenders that have a stake in the outcome but don't have a vote that counts.

Super Delegates = Church Members that get to vote.

Closed Primaries = Church Members Only Club.

Platform = A document stating the aims and principals of the party (The Bible).

One of my favorite words: Gerrymandering, this is when they redraw the district boundaries to have an electoral advantage.

Gerrymandering = When those that are against ______(fill in the blank with whatever you want) gather all their family & friends that haven't been at church in ages, but are still eligible to vote, so they can 'redraw' the district and swing the vote.

As Americans/Canadians we are asked to vote for the candidate that we think will best resolve the issues. However when the candidate becomes head of the party and doesn't resolve the issues it's the voters/constituents turn to flip-flop.

Ah yes, another wonderful political term. Flip-flop = a sudden change in position on an issue.

This is my real soap box: I'm tired of people voting for Jesus, then flip-flopping on the issue.

Where is the power of the Holy Spirit in our churches to convict us of the sin in our life? Where is the power of the Holy Spirit in our churches to change the lives of hurting people? Where is the Holy Spirit in my life to demonstrate His power to others?

People come into our churches or across our path and we convince them that they should give Jesus a try; so they raise their hand at the end of the service and vote for Him. But when they've tried Jesus and determine it doesn't 'work' for them, they rescind their vote. There are still others that will continue to flip-flop on the Jesus issue based on their circumstances. These are the folks that made Jesus Lord of their emergencies, not Lord of their life.

There are Christians that have voted for Jesus, yet they never bothered to read the platform or sign up for party membership. I'm not talking church membership. I talking about when you are so steadfast and unswerving in your commitment that you'll become a card carrying member of the organization. Your belief in the organization is so strong that you'll do whatever it takes to see its mission accomplished. They voted, but they didn't sign up.

At five years old when knelt in front of the TV while the Billy Graham crusade filtered into our living room and accepted Jesus as my Savior I did more than lift my hand and vote for the best option. I fell in love with Jesus and became a card carrying member.

If true revival brings repentance, what does true repentance bring?

Ellison Research, in Phoenix conducted research for the 2004 September/October issue of LifeWay's Facts & Trends magazine. It reported on the following statement:

"Regardless of what other faiths believe, Jesus Christ is the only path to salvation."

• 88 percent of pastors of Protestant churches said they agree strongly with the statement.
• 96 percent of pastors associated with the National Association of Evangelicals agreed strongly
• 65 percent of pastors associated with the National Council of Churches agreed strongly

When broken down to denominations, those that agreed strongly with the statement looked like this:

• 100 percent of Pentecostal ministers
• 98 percent of Southern Baptist ministers
• 77 percent of Lutherans ministers
• 65 percent of Methodists ministers

You've got to be kidding, not even all the nation's pastors are preaching repentance. I'm so tired of the Super Delegates watering down the platform so it can be voter friendly!(Just in case you missed it: Christians watering down the Word so as to not scare away the lost.)

Let me say here that I am a very happy part of a pentecostal church (Assemblies of God)where the pastor and congregation want to see the Holy Spirit move BIG and change lives~ our own and those of the lost.

The Jesus I know changes & guides my life daily. As a card carrying member:

I want the Jesus I give to others to be so powerful and meaningful there will never be a question of a flip-flop.

I want to see hurting people encounter the power of God.

I want the church and the lost to know that He is God of their impossible.

I want the church and the lost to know they can expect God to change their life and meet their needs.

I want to see voters, constituents & super delegates that boldly believe their platform is true and that it transforms lives.

I want to see people stand up for their beliefs and be counted for Jesus.

I want the Holy Spirit to be so BIG in my life and the life of the church that voter turn out sets records.

Time to sign up for the party membership, not just cast a vote.

Kim Angela

Less of Me

Philippians 3:10 That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death.

For all those that claim this as their life scripture, I'm impressed. I would have preferred something a little more upbeat like 2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things, at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

Blessing and abundance sell much better than suffering and death.

Philippians 3:10 is a scripture that we love to quote half a verse, 'That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection', leaving off the bits about sufferings and death. Yet if we could grasp Philippians 3:10 it would revolutionize our life, our family, our church and the world. You might think that's a whopper of a statement, and it is, in terms of life changing. It changed my life.

I remember where I was when I first prayed this passage of scripture.

I remember what was happening when I decided I shouldn't have prayed this scripture.

I know who I am thanks to having prayed this scripture.

My Christian heritage is rich. From early childhood I have been intimately acquainted with God's Glory, His miraculous healing power, the provision God has for us and even the ability to make something out of nothing. As I grew I felt that I knew God, little did I know that I was merely acquainted with the tip of his little finger. It was like saying I knew all about the United States because I'd visited Delaware.

Just after turning 30 I began to ask God for more of Him in my life. I felt that my walk with Him had become stagnant, stale and predictably routine. Missing was the intimate moments with God and the miraculous seemed to have vanished. Then I had an a-ha moment when I made two decisions that changed my life.

1. I was born to worship God. I will choose to worship Him no matter how I feel, no matter my circumstances or situation, no matter how boring the service. After all God is bigger than all those things.

2. I want to have the Fruit of the Spirit be in evident in my life in all things. A Galatians 5 Woman.

I began to pray Philippians 3:10. Lord, I want to have more of you and less of me in my life. I want to become acquainted with your presence and power. Lord, I know that the Fruit of the Spirit can only mature in my life when there are difficult situations that allow it to grow. After all love, joy and peace are easy to have when everything is going your way. I can even recall the road I was driving down when I finally said to the Lord, "God if I pray this prayer and mean it, I know what will happen", referring to the portion on suffering. "God I want to know you, your power and your presence and if I need to mature and die to my old nature to do it, I'm ready."

Let me tell you....be sure you are ready before you pray that one.

For the next three years life went along comfortably. My love relationship with Jesus grew through my worship and I began to see some of the old nature (pride, anger, etc) grow smaller. Then God kicked it up a notch. Please remember that God doesn't have bad things to give out, but sometimes bad things do happen to us. This is prime time to allow Him to work in us, teaching us to rely on Him and display His nature.

In a span of 24 months I:

1. Had kidney stones 3 times.

2. Got a divorce because my husband decided he'd rather live an alternative life style.

3. Ended up with $19,000 worth of debt from the marriage.

4. Discovered I had elevated calcium levels causing the kidney stones; elevated due to one growth on my parathyroid gland and one on my thyroid gland.

5. The two growths were wrapped around and pressing on my vocal chords causing me to lose my voice. My voice would give out after fifteen minutes, and singing was out of the question.

6. The required surgery called for them to cut my vocal chords, which could result in damaging my voice and losing the ability to sing.

7. The non-profit company I run was hauled into court by disgruntled parents charging that we were abusive and neglecting their adult children. This one made the AP news wire with a national story about me allegedly abusing our clients.

Now, ask me about the fellowship of his sufferings.

All were situations that I had no control over and could not fix despite my own efforts. I had to rely totally on Him to see me through. One of the many prayers I prayed during the 24 months was, "God, whatever lesson I'm supposed to learn through all this please let me learn the first time through." They were difficult times. But God was there.

Would I choose to live those 24 months again? No. But I will never regret living those 24 months and wouldn't change a thing. You see in those 24 months when it seemed that everything was crashing and burning, I worshiped Jesus no matter what it looked like. When it seemed that the situation couldn't get worse, yet is did, I met every moment with the love, joy and peace of the Lord. A lot of the old me died during those 24 months; the new me is thanks to Jesus.

Three years have passed since the end of my 24 months. Looking at it through man's eyes you'd say that all things resolved. I'm a debt free, happy single woman that owns two homes. My signing voice is richer and stronger than before the surgery. As their case fell apart the lawsuit was dismissed and the disgruntled people left the agency. The company is more prosperous than before the trouble began, receiving an award from the state for quality programming.

Looking at it through God's eyes, it was Him that brought miraculous resolution to every situation. I am not the same person that started this journey eight years ago. I have been transformed through the death to me process. There is less of me and more of Him.

Three Sundays ago I stood in the choir loft and prayed, "God I need to know you more, whatever the cost. God I do understand what I'm saying and what that might means, and I want more of you no matter what comes my way."

Stay Tuned. God isn't finished with me yet.

Kim Angela

Lessons From the Bag Lady Part 2: The Blue Honda

Dorothy is real and the story is true.

My parents read the Bag Lady blog after it was posted. They informed me that I hadn't remembered the story quite right. Here is the amended version.

That night as my Dad helped Dorothy gather her bags she turned to him, handing him a white envelope saying, "The Lord told me you needed money". Dad thanked her and put the white envelope on the table and drove Dorothy home. When he got back to the house he opened the white envelope. Inside the white envelope Dorothy had given them the thousands they needed, within $80 of the exact amount.

While Dorothy, the bag lady, saved our home and business property, which we still own, it didn't stop the bankruptcy. The next few years were difficult as our family struggled to regain our financial footing. There would be more white envelope moments from what the world/church would call the unlovely people that my parents had helped over the years that came at just the right moment.

Ecclesiastes 11:1-2 Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again. Give portions to seven, yes to eight, for you do not know what disaster may come upon the land.

While Dorothy taught me many life lessons another white envelope moment taught me a God lesson.

The Blue Honda

My grandfather was a man of many colorful words. One of my favorite quotes was apropos to our family situation after the bankruptcy. "Being broke isn't embarrassing, it's just inconvenient." Gone were the work trucks, gone were the fancy luxury cars, leaving us with one beat up truck that would leave you on the road. Being left on the road in the middle of winter in Canada is not a good idea.

After a youth outing on a Saturday night my Mom had no way of picking me up as my Dad had our truck at work. Very Inconvenient. The pastor's wife, a good friend, offered to give me a ride home. At home she came in and had tea with us. Sitting in the living room we began to discuss the vehicle situation, actually the lack thereof. During the conversation she turned to my Mom and asked, "If you could have any car you wanted what would it be?" Mom replied, "A Honda because it's good on gas". Adding my two cents I said, "And I'd like it to be blue."

After church the following morning my Dad was standing in the foyer chatting with Charlie, a retired friend. Charlie asked my Dad, "We've noticed Darlene & Kim walking to church (we lived 2 blocks from the church) and hadn't noticed her car in the parking lot." It had been a car you couldn't miss, a big black four-door Lincoln, a mafia type ride. Dad explained that times were a little tough and the car had gone in the bankruptcy so we were walking. Without even missing a beat Charlie replied, "Kay and I are leaving tomorrow for Arizona and we'll be gone the entire winter. I'll just drop off the wife's car for them to use this winter."

An hour before Sunday evening service Charlie & Kay arrived at our doorstep with keys in hand. A wave of emotions overwhelmed us, there sitting in our yard was a blue Honda.

There are two types of people reading this blog.

• Those that are in need of a white envelope moment.


• Those that can supply a white envelope moment.

If you are in need of a white envelope moment, He has heard every prayer and cry of your heart. God knows exactly where you live!

If you can supply a white envelope moment open your heart to hear the Lord is telling you to do. A bag of groceries, $5, a gift card, a thinking of you card in the mail; it doesn't have to be thousands it just has to be something.


What was my God lesson? We need to listen to the prompting of the Lord; we may be God's answer to someone's prayer.


Lord, create white envelope moments.


Kim Angela

The Bag Lady

I was 4 years old when I first met the bag lady that would eventually save our family's livelihood. Neighborhood kids called her the cat lady as they were as numerous as the cracks in the sidewalk around her shack of a home. Adults would have called her inconvenient, unlovely and unlovable. We called her Dorothy.

Dorothy had been an only child, orphaned and grew up to be a little spinster lady. Today we would have labeled her as a reclusive hoarder that lived below the poverty line. She lived on the other side of town in a house by the railroad tracks that had broken windows fixed with tape and horded items stacked to the ceiling. Everywhere Dorothy went she carried four to six shopping bags full of items, "You never know what you might need", she once told me. As a child I could never understand why she thought pantyhose with holes, cat food and a big comb that was missing teeth would be items she might need. Due to the large feline presence in her home, usually standing up wind was advisable as the unmistakable order of cat urine permeated her clothing.

No one was kind to Dorothy, except my parents.

Weekly my Mom drove to Dorothy's, picked her up and brought her home. At our house Dorothy took the opportunity to take a hot shower, do a little laundry and eat a good meal. At the end of the evening my Dad would pack up Dorothy, her bags and drive her back home. Mom & Dad made sure her bags had a few extra bits when she left; dinner left-overs or a few miscellaneous grocery items found their way to her bags.

Dorothy loved Jesus. Every now and then she would come to church with us. One Sunday as Dorothy was busy gathering her bags in the foyer after a morning service a church member approached Mom. The lady motioned toward Dorothy and asked, "Why do you even bother with her?" My Mom's response..."Because I love her. My parents are deceased and I am an only child, I could end up in her exact situation." The lady rolled her eyes and walked away.

When I was 13 my family was in the middle of the biggest crisis of my young life. One of the businesses owned by my parents was about to go bankrupt. Due to the structure of the companies, we were going to lose our home and second business property unless my Mom legally bought out my Dad's share of the company at fair market value. Where do you find thousands of dollars during a recession when you've used up your savings try to save the first business?

Dorothy!

"How much would you need to buy out Dale's portion", asked the bag lady? In 1978 the going interest rate was 26%; Dorothy believed that anything over 8% was usury. Yes, Dorothy the bag lady that often smelled of cats, had thousands of dollars which she lent to my parents, to be paid back when they could at 8% interest.

I know this blog is about my current journey, but this was a huge lesson learned at a early age that has remained with me to this day. This portion of my journey solidified the importance of generosity, kindness and compassion to all, not just the convenient people.

Here is what my parents and the bag lady taught me.

#1 God can provide something from nothing.

#2 None of my possessions and wealth are mine because of my ability. They are mine because of the God given, God blessed ideas, plans and work He has bestowed on me.

#3 If it isn't mine then I won't mind sharing it with others in order to bless them.

#4 Being inconvenienced is only a matter of time...time well spent.

#5 Open your home to those around you. Share your food, your shelter and your love with those that need a hug, a smile or a good cup of tea.

#6 Live so that you can be an unexpected blessing to someone else.

#7 See the person, not the label.

#8 It's not about how much money you have or can give. It's about giving of yourself, showing kindness and compassion to others.

I will never forget Dorothy and her bags. Nor will I ever pass up the opportunity to have someone in my home to love on them and bless them.

Now, go find your own bag lady.

Kim Angela

I Haven't Arrived, But I've Left

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. ~ Confucius
Ya think? So does every trip to the bathroom.

Recently I've begun to connect with old friends through my Facebook page. How do you catch up after 20+ years by writing a paragraph? Through the rigors of explaining the last two decades of my life I have discovered the obvious. I'm not where I thought I'd be, but I'm not where I used to be. In other words:

I Haven't Arrived, But I've Left

In one of the many 'catch up' conversations someone asked me how I ended up as an Executive Director working with individuals with developmental disabilities. The quickest answer was because if I'd been the counselor I thought I wanted to be I'd be in jail for murdering my clients. (I'm still working on the virtue of patience.) In my early twenties, I had already been on the mission field and was finishing up college. Visions and dreams of growing up to be a pastoral counselor danced in my head. My senior class at NCU voted me most likely to end up in Springfield running the counseling department for the Assemblies of God. Little did I know that counseling would have been like shooting myself everyday.

Sure our entire life is a journey that started with a single step, but which direction did you head when you took that first step?

When I left college I had great aspirations of getting my doctorate in psychology so I could run the pastoral counseling department at a big church. In order to pay the bills I answered an ad for a direct care staff in a vocational training program that worked with adults with developmental disability. That is the classy version of saying I was hired to wipe bottoms, feed people and be sure they stuffed enough envelopes to get the job done. I fell in love with the people, my job and discovered the field that would be my career for the next twenty years.

Okay, so maybe I didn't end up where I thought I was headed. Would you believe, I have still enjoyed the journey I've taken to get here. Would you believe, I still have a destination that I'm headed to, my journey isn't over. The writer of Hebrews says, 'Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.' Heb 12:1.

There are many races/journeys within our lives, each marked out for us. Some marked by us, some marked by others and some races marked out by Jesus. Have you reached the prize in every race of your life?

1 Corinthians 9:24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

It's never too late to start a race. More important is that it's never too late to get back on the path, detours were inevitable. Every journey brings with it maturity, wisdom, character and knowledge. No journey is ever pointless.

There is one journey that I thank God for daily ~ my relationship with Him. I used to have a poster that showed dozens of dogs running in one direction while one lone dog was headed in the other direction. The caption read, 'When everything is headed in your direction, you're probably going the wrong way.' My journeys have taught me that the Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5) only grows in my life when I am experiencing difficult times. It's always easy to be kind, loving, joyful, etc when the sky is clear and no one is bugging me. It isn't so easy when people are pushing my buttons and being mean or stupid. I know I haven't arrived at the destination God has for me. But I've left behind me the person I used to be, choosing to grow in maturity, wisdom, character and knowledge.

Don't let busy schedules, friends or life get in the way of pursuing your spiritual growth journey. You may not have arrived at your destination, but I pray that you have at least left where you were.

The mile markers on my journeys vary, none of them are still at 0.

I haven't arrived, but I've left.

Come on, take another step.

Kim Angela

Welcome To My Drawing Room

I am a huge fan of Victorian England. From the squalor of the tenements to the mansions in Belgrade Square the era epitomized the best and the worst of times. Suffragettes, workhouses, the first World's Fair, Florence Nightingale, Jack the Ripper, the grieving Queen Victoria, all elements that contributed to the burgeoning Industrial Revolution.

The Victorian era was a time of double standards. England had abolished slavery as the era began, yet ruling and conquering other countries in the name of the Crown during this time expanded the kingdom around the globe. The male, female role demonstrated the vast gulf in double standard. Divorce legislation in 1857 allowed a man to divorce his wife for adultery; however, a wife could only divorce her husband for adultery if it was accompanied by cruelty.

The Victorian Era was about appearance, what was publicly acceptable. An individual could live like hell in private, as long as his public persona demonstrated an accepted level of morality and honesty. Remind you of anything?

My favorite ideal in the Victorian era is the drawing room. Behind the doors of the mansions on the tree-lined streets the drawing room was the social hub of the respectable upper class. Here the 'general of the household', the wife, placed all the finery her home had to offer. Every decorative accoutrement of the Victorian home was on display while the wife held court, received visitors, served high tea and gossiped. The drawing room offered the impression of luxury, leisure and wealth, making that first impression a lavish, lasting one.

Visitors & friends were never allowed past the drawing room. To be allowed into the inner sanctum of the home the individual must be a family member, and then only in certain circumstances. It was all about the appearance of stability and stature. It must maintained at all cost.

If a household fell on difficult times with money in short supply the house would be run on less heat or food before the lavish decorations in the drawing room would be sold to make ends meet. Furnishings, art and family possessions would be sold from other parts of the house to pay bills. Every stick of furniture in the home would be sold with the drawing room the last to be relieved of any of its décor. Maintaining a large home in wintry England called for fireplaces to be kept burning with coal. As money for heat dwindled many fireplaces were no longer lit, except the drawing room fireplace. The bigger and brighter the fire, the great the appearance that the cost of coal was immaterial to you.

This façade would leave visitors believing that the household was in running order. Invited guests would hang out in the drawing room assuming that the appearance indicated that all was well with the household.

As Christians we have invited Jesus into our lives. All too often we have left Him lingering in the drawing room. He isn't allowed in to the inner sanctum or the corners of our house to see what we are truly about. It is to this same room that our church & family have been allowed to linger. Because of fear and embarrassment we have maintained the façade of the drawing room, never fully being able to use the entire house for its true purpose.

What happens when the church or a family member wanders into a room of your life that it is full of inappropriate furniture, or empty and devoid of life? We become indignant and feel that they have overstepped their boundary. After all we are about presenting the appearance of appropriateness.

Jesus wants us to be able to throw the doors of our heart and life wide open to Him. Ephesians says, ‘In opening every aspect to Him, He will provide you with strength from His glory to be able to live an overcoming life.’

Ephesians 3:17-16 ~ May He grant you out of the rich treasury of His glory to be strengthened and reinforced with mighty power in the inner man by the Holy Spirit, Himself indwelling your innermost being and personality. May Christ through your faith actually dwell, settle down, abide, and make His permanent home in your hearts! May you be rooted deep in love and founded securely on love, that you may have the power and be strong to apprehend and grasp with all God's devoted people, the experience of that love what is the breadth and length and height and depth of it; That you may really come to know practically, experience for yourselves the love of Christ, which far surpasses mere knowledge without experience; that you may be filled through all your being unto all the
fullness of God, and become a body wholly filled and flooded with God Himself! (Amp Version).

We need to understand that it isn't enough to invite Jesus into the drawing room of our lives. He wants to live in every room. Allow Jesus to live, settle down and set up housekeeping in you.

My two goals are that the drawing room of my life is comfortable for all, reflecting the entire home and to have all the rooms of my life inhabitable by everyone.

Kim Angela

Author's Note: I grew up in a three story Victorian house. My bedroom had been part of the original drawing room, it still had stainglass windows ~ who finds stainglass windows for a home in Canada at the turn of the century? It was all about appearance.

What's Your Such

My journey started when I was four years old; however there have been paths on my journey that have been poignant, life altering and scary. Some of the paths this journey has taken me down really could have used a GPS. You know one of those that you can program a nice male Australian accent to tell you how to get to your destination. At least if I had to go around the mountain one more time to learn my lesson I would have a mellow voice telling me to keep making a right until I completed the circle. Turn Right at the next rock in the road.


I ran over the most current rock in the road this past December.


The Women's ministry at my church does a wonderful Christmas Banquet for all the ladies. We decorate tables with Christmas finery, eat, laugh and enjoy each others company. This year our Mid-High Pastor shared on Joy. At the close of the message she opened the altars for ladies to receive prayer for everything and anything, especially joy. I had been asked to help in the altar and was standing behind two ladies that were being prayed for ~ one by the Mid-High Pastor and the other by the Pastor's wife. As I stood there praying my 12 year old niece came and stood in front of me. I leaned over and asked her what she wanted prayer for, she told me. I said okay let's wait for someone to be finished, who do you want to pray for you, the Mid-High Pastor or the Pastor's wife? She turned around and look at me saying, I want you to pray for me. Oh my!


At that moment I had a Peter & John at the Beautiful Gate moment. Problem was it would have been easier to give her silver or gold.

Acts 3:1-6 One day Peter and John were going up to the temple at the time of prayer--at three in the afternoon. Now a man crippled from birth was being carried to the temple gate called Beautiful, where he was put every day to beg from those going into the temple courts. When he saw Peter and John about to enter, he asked them for money. Peter looked straight at him, as did John. Then Peter said, "Look at us!" So the man gave them his attention, expecting to get something from them. Then Peter said, "Silver or gold I do not have, but such as I have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk." Taking him by the right hand, he helped him up, and instantly the man's feet and ankles became strong. He jumped to his feet and began to walk. Then he went with them into the temple courts, walking and jumping, and praising God.


What is my 'Such'? How do I get more 'such' in my life? I don't have enough 'such' in my life.


Have you ever had that inadequate or empty feeling? Sure I can tell you all the right answers, the Holy Spirit dwells in me ~ God will use my obedience when I pray for her yadda yadda yadda. Jesus & I are close ~ I'm good to go ~ I'll pray in the altar with anyone and have faith to believe God is going to meet their needs. This was different. I felt like crying and for days afterward couldn't help but feel like I had let her down. She was looking for something more than a prefunctatory prayer. She was looking for something that was life changing.


Go ahead post a comment about how all I need to do is be faithful and God will do the rest.


But is it always up to God? Is God the only one with a part to play or do I have something to do with what happens when I pray?


Eph 3:16-20 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us


God can do way beyond our wildest expectations, BUT it's only according to how much of His power (presence, life, personality, glory) that is inside us. Problem ~ I knew that already.
While my real life GPS can tell me where to find the next gas station or the closest Taco Bueno, it can't tell me were to find more 'such' for my life. Instead my GPS is telling me to turn right at this rock, go around the mountain until I find more 'such'.


I prayed with my niece that night a wonderful, heartfelt caring prayer. Did she find what she was looking for? I don't know. Perhaps if my 'such' that is at work within me was a little more powerful I would know that she received what she was looking for.


If finding more 'such'/power that worketh in me was as easy as programing a GPS I'd feel better. Here I am with my GPS programed to keep me going around this mountain until I can confidently say, 'Silver and Gold have I none, but such as I have I give to you,...'


Turn Right at the Rock.


Kim Angela

The 3 C's of My Christianity

Communing, or communicating with God is the reason for which I was created. Worship is one of the ways I communicate with Jesus. Would you believe that we were all created to be gardeners and hang out with God?

Genesis 2:15 The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.

We were not created to win souls.

I can hear your mouse skidding across the mouse pad trying to escape this blog after such blasphemy. Just keep reading!

C #1: COMMUNE with Him

We were created to commune with Him, walk and talk with Him in the cool of the day. When man fell the communing with God stopped. After man sinned they heard the sound of the Lord walking in the garden in the cool of the day. They were familiar with the sound; He had walked in the garden often so they knew the sound of God.

Genesis 2:8 Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden.

Because man sinned, our fellowship with God was lost; man was banished from the garden. Yet in His mercy God made a way for man to regain the fellowship and communication with Him through the death and resurrection of His son. God’s plan became flesh through His son Jesus. The initiation of His plan to reconnect called for His son to pick out twelve men just so they could fellowship together, getting to know Jesus.

C #2: COMISSIONED by Him

Mark 3:13 Jesus went up on a mountainside and called to him those he wanted, and they came to him. He appointed twelve--designating them apostles--that they might be with him and that he might send them out to preach.

Did you catch the last part of the verse, ‘that he might send them out to preach’? Now it’s time to win souls. We were created to commune ~ we are commissioned to see souls changed.

God’s goal for man since we were kicked out of the garden was to return to the fellowship for which we were designed. Our lives are spent striving toward the level of intimacy and communication man had while in the garden. The more we commune with God the greater our hunger and desire to answer His call of commission. Living and communing with Him in His glory leads us into fulfilling His commission.

C #3: CHANGED into His Likeness

Romans 8:29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.

The disciples went through the C-process. First they were called to COMMUNE with Jesus; then COMMISSIONED to go preach the gospel to all nations: then they were filled with the Holy Spirit, receiving power and began to personally CHANGE while CHANGING the world.

Those that knew Jesus through their communing received a commission from Him to change the world. Out of our communing with Jesus is birthed a desire tell others of the wonderful things we have discovered about Him. The more we discover the more change is derived in our life. The more change that is derived in our life the more others can see that we have something they need. As we commune with Him and lift Him up in our lives, others will notice that what we have on the inside is different.

I want something in my life worth telling others about. I want the person I demonstrate to the world be something that they see as a good thing for their life. As I commune with Jesus and become transformed into His image I believe that it makes a response to His commission easier.

Jesus may have been speaking about the manner of His death, but I believe that John 12:32 is a key to answering the commission.

John 12:32: And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me.

Is my life lifting up Jesus? Is my life a reflection of who Jesus is? Is my personality something that others see as Jesus inspired? Is how I act everyday lifting up the love, kindness, gentleness and peace of Jesus?

Tough questions that I can’t answer with always; hopefully more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.

Working out the 3 C’s of my Christianity has kept me from falling into the 3 R’s of Church.

R #1~Repent: We get saved.

R #2~Righteous: We figure out how to live an upright, moral and proper life based on the rules of the church.

R#3~Relax: We sit back and wait for Jesus to come back and get us out of here.

If the disciple’s journey followed the 3 R’s my journey would have never begun.

Lord, help me grow in the 3 C’s.

Kim Angela